Discussion - What stage am I in?

When you're in a relationship, you try your hardest to make sure that the person that you are in a relationship with is happy. You go places with them, you call them often, and you spend quality time with them. If by any chance you begin to lose interest in them or make them unhappy, things can get a little shaky and unless you make things work, the relationship could crumble and in the worst case scenario -- the relationship could be over. Many of us ask questions like "What happened to the flame that we once had?" or "Why aren't we happy like we were when we first started?" Although these are valid questions, they are rarely resolved. Sometimes you literally have to backtrack to see where or what it is/was that brought you two together. If one is serious enough about the relationship, they will go back to trying as if they were just beginning... if not, they'll just let it go.

This is also very true with our relationship with God. Before we find God, we are lost. In either revelation or tribulation we happen to find out about Him -- and after that (depending on the person) we try to get closer to Him. Those that try to get closer to Him (through prayer, fasting, and reading the bible) soon realize that a relationship is forming. They begin to trust God, and go to God with all of their worries and fears. It even feels like He is literally right there with you guiding, teaching and listening.

I like to call this the "on fire" stage.

This is the early stage of the relationship where the Christian is metaphorically "on fire" for God and will do whatever it takes to make Him happy. This stage is full of heavy praying, heavy reading of The Word, and major happiness. This stage is also where a lot of shifting happens in the real world. (you start losing friends, doors are opened, and things begin to rearrange.) Some people fear this stage because of the 'losing friends' part, but to those that continue trying to grow in their relationship with God, they soon realize that those "friends" weren't really friends to begin with.

Then there's the trouble stage.

Things aren't always all great and marvelous as one would think. There IS an enemy, and he is ALWAYS on the prowl looking to destroy or bring down God's children. He's especially mad when he had you for a while living a sinful non-God-centered lifestyle, and sees you trying to leave for a better option. This can be compared to what we would call a "jealous ex" in worldly relationships. This is a rough time for a "younger in the faith" Christian, who recently formed a relationship with God because they are typically easily distracted and that past life just seems sooooo great right? Wrong. I've seen a lot of people fall back into old ways when trouble comes, because they just weren't ready. I can even say that I fell victim myself into old ways before...we all do I guess. HOWEVER, God loves us tooooooo much to just let us go that easily.

The "second chance" stage.

Sometimes when we slip up, we really take it hard on ourselves. We feel like we are unworthy and we will never ever be good enough. This is a very depressing feeling, and it also comes when we feel like we are stuck in a certain place or situation. Sometimes doubt even surfaces, with thoughts such as "Does God even really exist?" or "Why am I even doing this?" ...I assure you, this is a trick of the devil. If he can get you into thinking that you are unworthy, then he can get you to do what he wants. Have you ever thought to yourself "I love God...I feel like I'm living right - or at least trying to - but I just feel down for some reason." If you love God, and are trying to do right, why should you feel down? You're doing the right thing! You're trying to walk on the narrow path!

"For the gate is small and the way is narrow that leads to life, and there are few who find it." 
- Matthew 7:14


Like I said before, there IS an enemy and he is ALWAYS on the prowl.

"Be alert and of sober mind. Your enemy the devil prowls around like a roaring lion looking for someone to devour." 1 Peter 5:8

However - God is good and He waits patiently for us to come to our senses, come back to Him, and leave all that silly mess the enemy is trying to create in us alone. It seems as if we get a billion chances in life, but I call this the second chance stage because it's like a second wind - like the "on fire" stage again almost. We say "ok, I'm going to do this again...but this time I'm going to get it right." (Sometimes over, and over, and over again.)

Many Christians are in the second chance stage. It's a weird stage, where you feel good that you're trying...but you feel like you could be trying harder.

Which leads to the complacent stage.

Complacency is the worst feeling ever. Sometimes it even feels like lukewarmness. Like you're just going through the motions rather than actually striving for a relationship with God. Like "Am I doing this because I want to, or because I feel I have to?" ...Once these questions roll in, we tend to begin slacking off and not doing what we should with as much enthusiasm. This tends to lead to lack of prayer and that "fire" we spoke on kind of diminishes. Kind of half heartedly doing things...not really caring...not taking things too seriously. Then what feels like lukewarmness BECOMES lukewarmness.
That's a no no.

So what do you do? How do you keep your "fire lit" with God? How do you make sure that your relationship remains in tact and you don't lose your faith? 

I say the same way you would any relationship. Go back to where it all began. Back to spending a lot of time with Him. Back to reading the bible everyday. Back to giving all of your troubles to Him and trusting He'll help you get through them. Back to praying frequently. Back to square one. We have to get that thirst back. Get that fire back. Save our relationship. Save ourselves.

How would you suggest keeping up a healthy relationship with God? What stage do you think you are in? Are you in a new stage? Would you add anything to the list? Let's all talk about it!